Handstands

You make me do handstands for you. You make me feel blue through and through. Why must you make me do the things I do? You haven’t got slight empathy. You say things that are mean to me. You haven’t got slight sympathy, it’s true. You keep on running after me. Yet, you can’t seem to handle me. You keep getting mad at me. Why are you so angry and confused? You continue blaming things on me. You feel like I’m a weight on you, then why are you putting up with my abuse? You sit there and you talk to me. Your voice is cold as ice can be. You watch me set my emotions free on you. You think I’m simply a big mess. You listen to me as I digress. You know I think that you’re digressing too. You want to care, but you don’t care. You tell me you aren’t going there. You watch me as I wipe away my tears. You make me do handstands for you, yet you’re doing them as I watch you. Why do you keep putting up with my abuse? You believe with more work we’ll be happy. You don’t know that I think you’re really sappy. You don’t know how much I want to let this go. Then you let some emotion show, and I feel weak ’cause I want to know…do you think that we can continue to converge? You stand up and walk to me. You put your arms around me. You say you can’t stop loving me today. You watch me turn and open the door. You watch me leave without a thought, yet you don’t know my heart aches for you inside. You make me do handstands for you. You make me feel blue through and through. You often let me be the one who’s right. Your emotions are so deep in you and surface when I’m next to you. You let my body walk away, but only for tonight. You keep hanging on to me, and I keep holding on to you, as we both keep doing handstands in our minds.

Bye Bye Bigger Boobs

So I've officially decided to trade in the boobs for a smaller waistline and hopefully much smaller butt. I'm going to miss my boobs dearly, but diabetes is far too prominent on both sides of my family for me to remain 15 pounds overweight. I've enjoyed having 34Cs, of course not the largest things, but the size most women long for. Unfortunately, I had to put on 20 pounds before I could even have them. Well, here I go. Day 1 for the 7th or 8th time in 2 years to lose weight.

Present Plan of Action Week 1:
Go to the gym each day of the week
-35 minutes on the elliptical
-15 minutes pilates
Breakfast
- yogurt and cereal
Lunch
- salad
Dinner
- chicken and vegetables
Daily snack
- carrots or almonds

Worse than being attacked by millions of fuzzies....

So I just got a really great email about summer sessions and how they are a great way to take "hard to get" classes and get a head start on graduation. I also got this wonderful email just as I'm fuming about all the money I don't have to waste on summer sessions and an extra year at beautiful UC Davis because I can't get into classes I need for my major during the REGULAR school year. You bet I sent those "Summer Sessions" people some angry words. "Yes," I said, "please take all that extra money I have to burn". Waitlisted is now the official story of my life, as well as my new name on the roster. It's such an exciting adventure to keep taking filler classes each quarter as I wait and don't get into the classes I thought I was paying for. This is especially great if you like the "chase"...chasing down all of those lab sections you no longer realize the need to go pee. Never mind that we're all paying the same amount of tuition, some more than others because the school thinks those children are in a financial bracket that pays for itself. I ask the school to please not take into consideration that my parents are also paying for my brother to attend an institute of higher learning and that our reported total income is not the money my parents have saved to put me through school. So here I am. On the waitlist again. Another quarter goes by as this BioSci student takes English and Humanities (I have probably 1 general ed class left to complete). Another quarter goes by full tuition covered by none other than my parents....but my adviser said I can take summer school and it's perfectly OK to need more than four years. Thank-god she's paying for all those extra quarters!!! I mean when she first suggested that I was just about to sh...wait...what do you mean she's not paying for anything?